living life by email.

I remember there was a time where Jonathan and I were in constant contact via phone multiple times a day, just to say hi, or "I love you" or to see how the other was doing (back then he was commuting to San Diego from LA and often spent days at a time on the ship). We thought that was rough. Since coming to Japan, I have found myself living my day to day life listening to the saved msgs on the answering machine just to remember his voice and sitting next to my computer as if it needed to be babysat. Most days I am lucky and get to recieve emails that vaguely resemble a conversation, but other days I don't hear anything at all... and then there are times where I don't hear from him for two or more days, and those are the days I realize I have to rip myself away from the computer (and the house) to keep myself from going crazy. I used to love having email, it was always a pleasant surprise to see an email from a friend or family member I hadnt talked to in a while, now it's like a drug, calling to me, keeping me up all hours of the night, causing me to feel down and a little bit lonely when I see there are no new messages **sigh** I can't wait for shore duty.